


Coming Home

by slanted-HP-knitting (SlantedKnitting)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Dirty Talk, Feelings, Light BDSM, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 12:03:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10437360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlantedKnitting/pseuds/slanted-HP-knitting
Summary: Remus returns to Grimmauld Place after some time away on Order business. Sirius needs some warming up before he gives Remus a proper greeting.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written HP fanfic in ages, and I've never focused on this pairing before, but I was recently re-reading Order of the Phoenix and got inspired. Enjoy :)

It was late. Definitely past dinner, although Remus was sure he could scrounge up something if there were no leftovers.

With a final glance around the square, Remus made his way up the stone steps to number twelve, Grimmauld Place. He tapped the front door with his wand, listened for the long line of locks to open, and then went inside.

The front hall was empty. It was dark and dusty as always, but Remus still felt comforted; he was back. He had a hard time calling the house ‘home,’ since he still had his own home, growing cold and musty, in the country, but number twelve was as much his home as any other place. It was where he lived, it was where he returned to when he wasn’t out on duty, it was where he felt safest, and it was where Sirius was.

If anything was a home these days, it was Sirius.

Remus made his way to the kitchen, hoping there might be some stew he could warm up, or perhaps a pie or at least salad.

The kitchen was dimly lit and empty, except for Sirius, who was standing by the hearth and drinking what Remus assumed was Ogden’s Old Firewhisky.

Remus took off his jacket and set it down on the table, making sure the metal buttons knocked against the wood as loudly as possible. Sirius didn’t move.

“You’re late,” Sirius said, still staring down at the dying fire.

“I know.”

Remus didn’t apologise; there was no point. He was doing work for the Order of the Phoenix, they all were, and it was unpredictable and dangerous. He couldn’t be blamed for a wrong estimate at how long he’d be away. He wasn’t following his own schedule and couldn’t help that he was returning three days later than planned.

“Injured?” Sirius guessed.

“No.”

Sirius sighed and took a long swig of his drink. “There’s stew.”

Remus looked around to see a small bowl of stew waiting for him on the counter. He imagined Sirius saving food for him every night for the past week, in case he’d come back early instead of late, and hoped Buckbeak had been reaping the benefits.

He set the bowl on the table and brought it to a boil with his wand, then took his time blowing on it and waiting for it to cool down enough for him to eat.

It was easily the best food he’d had in three weeks.

“Who’s here?” he asked when he was finished, hoping to coax Sirius away from the fire and the alcohol.

“No one else.”

That meant it was just the Weasleys, Harry and Hermione, and the two of them.

“Molly been keeping you busy?”

Sirius drained his glass and turned to glare at Remus, his brows drawn tight and the frown lines around his mouth exaggerated in the poor lighting.

“Sorry,” Remus said quickly. “I’m sorry. Let’s not fight.”

Sirius scoffed and leaned against the wall with his arms crossed, but he didn’t pursue the point.

Remus licked off his spoon one last time before standing and moving his dishes back to the counter. He took the long route to Sirius, walking the length of the table and crossing in front of the fire, and Sirius stiffened as soon as he got close.

“I’m late,” he said quietly, reaching out to smudge a line of dirt and dust on Sirius’s neck. “But I’m here, now.”

“For how long?” Sirius asked roughly.

Remus shook his head, not knowing and not wanting to lie or risk another bad guess.

Sirius sighed, long and ragged, and Remus saw his shoulders droop a bit as he forced himself to relax.

“I can’t do this much longer,” Sirius whispered.

“I know.”

Sympathy was all Remus could offer, but he knew it wasn’t enough. Sirius was losing himself in this house and all Remus could do was watch, knowing Dumbledore and the others were right about how dangerous it would be for Sirius to be out doing the work of the Order. He’d be dead within a week.

Remus knew Sirius would prefer that, but he had to keep Sirius alive for Harry, for the morale of the Order, for the safe headquarters, and for his own very selfish reasons.

Sirius looked ready to say something else, to argue or to vent or ask about the weather — Remus didn’t care what but he didn’t want to hear it. He just wanted to be close to Sirius, to make sure Sirius was all right, to make sure _they_ were all right.

Remus slid his arms around Sirius’s thin waist and turned so that he was the one leaning against the wall and Sirius was pressed against him. Sirius huffed and wrapped his arms around Remus’s neck, burying his face in Remus’s hair.

“I need you to keep coming back.”

“I know,” Remus said, tightening his grip so much that Sirius gasped. He wanted so badly to promise that he would always return, that he would stay alive, that he wouldn’t leave Sirius, ever.

They both knew he could never promise that.

There were footsteps and Sirius moved to break away but Remus pulled him close, refusing to let him go. He didn’t care who saw. He had never cared.

Sirius pressed his face into Remus’s neck, breathing hard as someone came into the kitchen, made some noise at the cupboards, and then walked out.

“Who was it?” Sirius asked without lifting his head.

“Don’t know,” Remus said honestly. He had kept his eyes closed, fighting to stay in the moment with Sirius.

“It could have been anyone,” Sirius hissed, leaning away slightly. “It could have been Harry.”

“It was probably Kreacher,” Remus said reasonably.

He wasn’t interested in having this argument again. He’d never cared or been ashamed about his feelings for Sirius and he’d never wanted to keep it such a secret from everyone. He didn’t think Sirius was ashamed exactly — after Azkaban, he wasn’t sure Sirius could even be bothered with something as petty as shame — but it was clearly something Sirius didn’t like about himself.

“Come on,” Remus said, dropping his arms from Sirius’s waist so he could hold Sirius’s hands instead. “Let’s get upstairs.”

“You know it wasn’t Kreacher,” Sirius said, pulling his hands out of Remus’s grip and taking a step back. “It could have been anyone,” he said again. “It could have been — ”

“Sorry,” Arthur called from the hall. “It was only me. Didn’t mean to interrupt.” He came back into the kitchen and gave them a small, guilty smile. “Was just looking for a midnight snack.”

Sirius crossed in front of the fire and opened a cupboard. He pulled out a tin and slid it down the long table.

Arthur took the tin curiously. “Thanks,” he said, peaking under the lid. “Sorry again. Carry on.” He gave Remus a wink before leaving.

Sirius rubbed at his eyes tiredly.

“That was… we’ve gone all summer, Lupin,” he said angrily.

“He doesn’t bloody care,” Remus said. “You’re the only one who does.”

Sirius rolled his eyes and left. Remus listened to his footsteps up the stairs, wondering how long he’d stay upset this time.

Remus cleaned up his dishes before heading upstairs. Sirius was in the shower on their floor so he bided time in the drawing room, looking at the massive Black family tapestry.

Eventually he heard the water turn off and then he waited another few minutes before going up and taking his turn. He scrubbed off as much of the outside world as he could, washed his hair, and then just stood under the hot stream for a while, thinking of nothing.

When his thoughts started creeping back, thoughts of Harry’s upcoming hearing and thoughts of the prophecy and thoughts too terrible to name, Remus stepped out of the shower and dried himself off. He left his clothes in a heap on the floor, wrapped a towel around his waist, and padded across the hall to his and Sirius’s room.

Sirius was sitting on the edge of their bed, dressed in pyjamas and looking sad. He didn’t seem to be angry or regretful or overly tired; he just looked sad.

“Let’s order a pizza tomorrow,” Remus suggested. “Just you and me. I’ll pick it up and we can eat it up here and play chess. No cleaning, no Weasleys, no nothing. Just you, me, pizza, and chess.”

Sirius raised one eyebrow skeptically.

“Okay,” Remus said slowly. “No pizza, then. Indian?”

Sirius’s other eyebrow went up.

“Chinese?”

Sirius’s lips quirked just slightly and Remus fought down a grin.

“You don’t want French food, do you?” he asked, pulling a face.

Sirius scrunched up his nose.

“No, didn’t think so. So, that’s a ‘no’ for Italian, Indian, Chinese, French…”

Sirius blinked and suddenly the light moment was gone and everything felt heavy again. Remus leaned against a dresser and rubbed his eyes tiredly.

“I’m serious about tomorrow,” he said, looking down at the floor. “Let’s stay in here all day. We’ll only leave for food — whatever food you want, I’ll get it. Steak dinner, roast duck, whatever. Whatever you want. But let’s take the day off and be together, if we can.”

That last part was the problem. If Dumbledore showed up, if bad news broke, if anything happened then the day would be taken from them; but they could try.

“Promise?”

Remus looked up, nodding.

“Okay,” Sirius said, getting to his feet. “You know I always win at chess, though.”

“Only because you cheat,” Remus teased.

“I would never!” Sirius feigned offence. “I’m an honest man! My record proves that.”

Remus snorted and pushed away from the dresser so he could shut Sirius up with a kiss.

It was slow at first, with Sirius hesitant and unsure, but then Remus slipped his hand under Sirius’s shirt and Sirius moaned at the touch and Remus stopped holding back. Remus yanked off Sirius’s shirt and bit at his lower lip before ducking down to suck a bruise into his neck.

“That’s,” Sirius gasped, his fingers digging to Remus’s sides, “that’s not — we’re not teenagers, _Moony_.”

“No?” Remus pulled back to admire the red mark blooming over Sirius’s pale skin. He wanted to give Sirius another, but he satisfied himself instead with nibbling on Sirius’s earlobe until Sirius was sighing and pulling at his hips, trying to create a friction between them.

Remus slipped a hand into Sirius’s pyjama bottoms and tugged on his cock until he was half hard.

“Come on,” Remus said, moving his hand lower to press his fingers into the sensitive skin behind Sirius’s balls. “Come on,” he urged.

Sirius did not comply. He kept his hands on Remus’s waist, holding the towel in place, forever the contentedly stubborn man Remus had fallen for so many years before.

“Come. On,” Remus grunted, punctuating his words with a tug on Sirius’s balls. Sirius huffed, his hips jerking slightly, but still did nothing.

Remus kissed him firmly, too impatient for games after being away for so long, but Sirius’s lips were soft, timid even, and Remus realised he’d been going too fast.

“Hey,” he said gently, wrapping his fingers back around Sirius’s cock. “Touch me. Please. I want you to.” He moved his mouth to Sirius’s ear, licking it once before whispering, “I know you want to. I know you like it. I know it makes you hot and hard.”

Sirius’s cock jumped a little in his hand and he grinned, knowing he was on the right track.

“You love it,” he continued, stroking Sirius faster. “You love having a hard dick in your hands. In your mouth. Shoved up your tight, perfect arse.”

Sirius grunted before shoving Remus away. Remus leaned against the dresser again, licking his lips as Sirius stripped and dropped to the floor. Sirius pulled the towel away and, bypassing any sense of shame or hesitancy, took as much of Remus’s cock into his mouth as he could manage.

Remus hissed and gripped the edge of the dresser, trying to breath through the shock of stimulation for the first time in so many weeks. He looked down, gratified to see Sirius’s cock twitching and hardening, as he knew it would. As much as Sirius liked to dwell in how much he disliked this side of himself, there could be little doubt that he did truly enjoy sucking on Remus’s cock.

And Remus enjoyed it, too, of course. Sirius gave head like a man starving for cock, and it wasn’t long before Remus had to push Sirius away to stop himself from ending their tryst too soon.

“Bed,” he said, watching as Sirius sat back on his haunches to catch his breath.

Sirius shook his head, giving his own cock a few slow tugs.

“No? What, then?”

Sirius stood up and gave Remus a long, deep kiss, letting Remus fully taste himself on Sirius’s tongue. Then, without warning, Sirius pulled back and turned Remus around so he was facing the dresser.

“Oh, fuck,” Remus breathed, slightly weak-kneed at the thought of what Sirius was about to do. “You love it,” he said, voice embarrassingly ragged as he spread his legs a little. He heard Sirius drop back down to the floor. “You love pushing me to the brink over — ” He gasped as Sirius used both hands to spread his cheeks. “And over — ” Sirius’s hot breath was the only brief warning he got. “And over — ah!”

Again, Sirius wasted no time. He worked his tongue expertly over Remus’s hole, slowing only when Remus’s moans grew too loud.

“Okay,” Sirius said, sitting back again and leaving Remus shivering from the loss of contact. “Bed.”

Remus took a few deep breaths before turning around. Sirius was standing by the bed, stroking himself and looking smug. Remus stepped close and wiped a bit of spit off Sirius’s chin before kissing him. Sirius kissed back roughly, digging his hands into Remus’s hair and sliding his tongue into Remus’s mouth and pressing their bodies more tightly together, trying to get more, trying to take more, trying to have as much as he could.

Remus let Sirius feast for a moment, glad to see his pretenses had all fallen away, but then broke the kiss and guided him onto the bed.

“You don’t need to take your time,” Sirius said, struggling under Remus’s weight for a moment before he managed to stretch across the bed to get a bottle of lube off the nightstand.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Remus asked, sitting up between Sirius’s legs and pouring lube over his fingers. He reached down to rub his slick fingers over Sirius’s hole.

Sirius bent his knees and spread his legs to give Remus better access.

“Does that mean you’ve been enjoying yourself in my absence?”

Sirius swallowed thickly as Remus continued teasing him.

“Playing with toys?” Remus guessed, pressing the tip of his first finger inside Sirius, his cock twitching at how hot and tight it was. “Or just your fingers?”

Sirius closed his eyes, breathing slowly as Remus slid the rest of his finger in.

“Did you think of me?” Remus asked, crooking his finger a bit. Sirius gasped. “Did you think of me just like this, spreading you open and taking my sweet time to get you ready?”

Sirius bit his lip, a pained expression ghosting briefly across his face as Remus pressed the tip of another finger in.

“Or did you imagine it was you? Burying your fingers in my arse, trying to keep yourself from slamming in until I was begging for it?”

Sirius moaned, low and broken, as Remus pushed his second finger all the way inside.

“Open your eyes,” Remus said, not liking the barrier between them.

Sirius obeyed, his expression softening as they looked at each other.

“Of course I thought about you,” he said, lifting his hips to encourage Remus. “Always you.”

Remus smirked. “Yeah? Never Severus?”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Fuck you.”

“Maybe next time,” Remus said mildly, crooking both his fingers until Sirius cried out. “Shh,” Remus soothed even as he pressed harder. “Don’t want to be overheard, do you?”

“Fuck you,” Sirius said again. “Just because you don’t mind if all your old students hear you shagging — ”

“I mind,” Remus said, finger-fucking Sirius in earnest. “That’s not what this is about.”

Sirius only huffed, rocking his hips in time with Remus’s fingers.

“Which was it?” Remus asked, slowing down a little.

“What?” Sirius asked breathlessly.

“Toys? Fingers?”

Sirius clamped his muscles around Remus’s fingers, forcing Remus to stop.

“That’s for me to know, Lupin, and for you to fantasise about for the rest of your life.”

Remus grinned and crooked his fingers, enjoying Sirius’s strangled gasp, before pulling out and grabbing the lube again. He rubbed some more on Sirius’s arse before coating his cock with it.

“Don’t know why I bother asking,” Remus teased, shifting up and pushing at Sirius’s thighs until they were spread out properly. He grabbed a spare pillow and slotted it under Sirius’s hips. “You do love your secrets.”

Sirius kicked Remus’s side lightly and then, apparently deciding that wasn’t enough, pressed his foot to Remus’s chest, pushing Remus away.

“That’s not fair,” he said quietly.

Remus sighed, his heart sinking a little, and shook his head. He set Sirius’s foot back down on the bed. “No. I’m sorry. I was joking.”

“It wasn’t funny.”

“I know. I know.” Remus ran his hands up and down Sirius’s thighs. “I’m sorry. I am. It was a stupid thing to say.”

Sirius scrubbed his hands over his face, still looking angry.

Remus leaned down and gave Sirius’s cock a long lick, from the base to the tip, before taking it in his mouth and bobbing up and down a few times. When he pulled off, Sirius gave him an unimpressed, expectant look.

Remus repeated his move, making the lick a little slower and the bobbing a little faster, but Sirius still looked unconvinced.

The third time, Remus took such a long time to lick from the bottom to the top of Sirius’s cock that Sirius’s breath caught in his throat and it sounded like he’d forgotten how to breathe.

The fourth time, Remus only got half-way through the long lick when Sirius got impatient and grabbed at his hair, forcing him to go faster. Remus chuckled and sucked wetly on the tip of Sirius’s cock before sitting up.

“Ready?”

Sirius glared menacingly, but Remus had stopped being intimidated by him long ago. He reapplied the lube and, holding up one of Sirius’s thighs with one hand and his cock against Sirius’s hole with the other, pressed slowly into Sirius.

Sirius groaned, his jaw clenched, and Remus paused.

“Keep going,” Sirius demanded, but Remus knew better.

Keeping one hand at his own cock, Remus reached for Sirius’s and stroked it tightly.

Sirius huffed and lifted his hips, pushing forward until Remus could either give in or pull out and start over again. Remus gave in, sliding the rest of the way in with a moan, and then stilled again, frowning.

“I told you to keep going,” Sirius said simply.

Remus rolled his eyes and placed his hands on the back of Sirius’s thighs, under Sirius’s knees, and held them out to the side. He shifted, pulling out just a little before pushing back in, and Sirius sighed.

“Yeah,” he said encouragingly, lifting his hips a little. “Come on.”

Remus bit down on his lower lip as he built up a rhythm, trying not to go too hard too fast. He and Sirius could fuck each other raw if they let themselves, and they used to do it every chance they got. At first, at Hogwarts, it was just so new that they couldn’t stop themselves from getting carried away. Then, during the first war, they had used it as a distraction. They spent hours going at it, going so hard they’d pass out afterwards, numb to the pain and the anger and the fear and the overwhelming sense of helplessness. And when Sirius had returned and gone to stay at Remus’s house in the country; it had taken a while — they had both changed so much — but eventually they got there. They’d relearnt each other through rough sex, testing old boundaries and building new intimacies, until they’d had to separate again.

Here, at Grimmauld place, it was different. Remus was away a lot and Sirius was trapped inside, fighting against himself and his old demons and the crushing memories of their past.

And they weren’t alone anymore. There were others in the house and they had to be considerate, or at least conscious, of what they were doing and when and where.

“Come on,” Sirius grunted, stroking himself in double-time to Remus’s thrusts. “Come on, harder.”

Remus moved slower, slamming in more roughly each time until Sirius was moaning freely and barely managing to keep a grip on his cock.

“Yeah, yeah,” Sirius panted, reaching under his head. He grabbed a pillow and pressed it to his face so he could be louder.

Remus could hear him groaning, crying out into the pillow each time Remus managed to hit his prostate in just the right way, and wanted to hear more. Remus shifted up, pressing Sirius’s thighs down unless they were flush against his chest and his feet were in the air. Sirius’s hand fell away from his cock and he held his ankles for a moment, quickly tangling his fingers in Remus’s hair when Remus leaned down over him.

Remus pushed the pillow away and kissed Sirius to muffle his moans. He braced himself on the bed, lacking the room to fuck into Sirius as much as he had just been doing, but rolling his hips to much the same response.

“Fuck — Lupin,” Sirius groaned, tightening his grip on Remus’s hair. “Godric, I need to come.”

“You will,” Remus promised, rocking his hips as fast as he could, making Sirius erupt into another chorus of moans.

“I missed you,” Sirius gasped out when Remus slammed in hard and rolled his hips slowly.

Remus gulped and sat up, holding Sirius’s legs to the side again. “Missed you, too,” he grunted, working up a quick pace. “Missed this. Missed your stupid hair.”

“Missed your ugly face,” Sirius countered, reaching for his cock. He pulled on himself quickly, letting out a high-pitched whine that told Remus he was close.

Remus let go of Sirius’s legs and grabbed his wrists instead, holding them down on the bed so he couldn’t touch himself.

“Lupin,” Sirius warned with a bit of a growl. He struggled to break out of Remus’s grip, but Remus held on tight. “Come on, what — ”

Remus gripped Sirius’s arms as hard as he could, until Sirius was crying out and his cock leaking precome onto his stomach.

“You like it,” Remus said breathlessly, still thrusting his cock into Sirius as hard as he could. “You love the way it feels, not having the power to finish this your way.”

“I’m — _oh_ , oh there! Right there.” Sirius began rocking his hips against Remus’s, the most delicious noises slipping past his lips as Remus hit his prostate over and over again. “That’s — ” He cried out breathlessly. “Fuck, I’m — you’re going — I’m going — Remus, I’m — ”

With a series of moans that would definitely get them found out, Sirius came all over his chest as Remus continued fucking him.

Remus could remember, with astonishing clarity, the one and only other time Sirius had managed to come without his cock being touched. It was the night of James and Lily’s wedding; Sirius had been drunk, Remus had been drunk, and it had been so hot that Sirius had come again, with Remus’s face buried in his arse, barely minutes later.

“Shit,” Remus hissed, pulling out before Sirius had finished coming. He let go of Sirius’s hands to stroke himself, already tipped over the edge from the memory and the shock of it having happened again.

“Come on me,” Sirius panted, pulling slowly on his cock, relishing in the aftershocks. “On my face. On me. Do it.”

Remus shifted up, straddling Sirius’s stomach, and choked out a groan as he came in great streaks on Sirius’s face. Sirius moaned through it, his eyes closed but his mouth open and some of Remus’s come catching on his lips. The rest painted his cheekbones, his jawline, the stubble on his chin.

Breathing heavily, Remus slumped a little as he came back to his senses, stroking himself through the last of it. He rested as much weight as he dared on Sirius’s middle, his legs shaking too badly to hold himself up anymore. He waited, staring down at the filthy, beautiful mess he’d made, hoping he hadn’t gone too far again.

Slowly, first licking the come off his lips and still with his eyes closed, Sirius smiled.

For a moment he looked young again. Happy and handsome. Daring and dangerous. Carefree.

The glow faded but the smile stayed and Remus leaned down to kiss him, relieved.

“Thank you,” Sirius muttered, opening his eyes and giving Remus’s thighs a gentle squeeze.

Remus chuckled and climbed off the bed to get his towel from where it had been tossed to the floor by the dresser. He helped wipe off Sirius’s chest and face and then lay down, pressing his face to Sirius’s neck.

He refrained from saying what he wanted — that he loved Sirius more than anything, that he was sorry he had been three days late, that he didn’t want to leave again, that what he wanted more than anything was to grow old and grumpy with Sirius by his side — and settled, instead, for, “Good?”

“Great,” Sirius answered, and that was enough for now.

Remus kicked up their covers until they were warm and cozy underneath.

“Pizza tomorrow, right?” Sirius asked, pushing Remus’s hair out of his face as they snuggled close together.

“Right.” Remus gave Sirius one last kiss before they closed their eyes and fell asleep, wrapped in each other and safe from everything else.


End file.
